Sunday, March 7, 2010
Jon Gosselin: Sparing American the Sight of His Weenie
"By all means I am not doing playgirl. I have no intentions on doing it whatsoever. No one ever contacted my reps or myself." -- @jongosselin1
Saturday, March 6, 2010
Justin Bieber: Chelsea Handler Is About to Get Murdered by a Mob of Preteens
"still one of my favorite interviews. @chelsealately is my cougar. haha. just kidding - - - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9_IP9xsAfK8" -- @justinbieber
Goldie Hawn: Keeps Her Head in an Emergency
"Went to Maui for a cleanse. Awakened by sirens. Tsunami warning. Freaked fled up country at 6am with two different shoes and my lip gloss" -- @goldiehawn
Pink: Crazy Knows No Country
"I have about 18 different voices in my head right now and they all have different accents." -- @pink
Neil Diamond: He's Got Jokes
"Thanks for sending the jokes... keep 'em coming. Why don't cannibals eat clowns? Because they taste funny!" -- @neildiamond
Lily Allen: He Should Just Say 'Dawg' More
"Watching Simon cowell on itv. He seems to use the terms "I'll be honest with you" and "genuinely" quite alot."
"It's as if he assumes that we that think he's a liar" -- @lilyroseallen
"It's as if he assumes that we that think he's a liar" -- @lilyroseallen
Tyra Banks: High Security Heaven?
"My mama and I just met Morgan Freeman. Total groupie moment! We are in Shawshank heaven!!!" -- @tyrabanks
Ke$ha: Keep Your Poop Stains to Yourself
"Don't wanna know about ur poop patterns kind sir" -- @keshasuxx
MC Hammer: Disney Has a New Prison Ride?
"Guess where I am now ??? http://twitpic.com/16v1bk"
"Yes....Alcatraz night tour. Dinner in the Birdman cell."
"That was fantastic !!! Dinner on the Rock !! http://twitpic.com/16wh6t" -- @mchammer
"Yes....Alcatraz night tour. Dinner in the Birdman cell."
"That was fantastic !!! Dinner on the Rock !! http://twitpic.com/16wh6t" -- @mchammer
Andrew WK: Have Fun or Go to Hell
"PARTY TIP: Let's dedicate all our Saturday partying to God." -- @andrewwk
Star Jones: Reverse Advertising
"Singing, dancing & rapping black people will not make me go out & buy fries...it will make me cut up potatoes & get the oil. #ThinkPeople" -- @starjonesesq
Reggie Bush: And By 'People,' He Means 'Little People'
"I'm asking your guys thoughts cuz you guys are the people. I like to know what the general feeling is on this topic. Don't read into it..." -- @reggie_bush
Billy Corgan: Been Watching Too Much 'Buffy"
"God Bless, keep away the vampyrs! The ones that drain your blood for riffs and infinite soul reductionist theories! Tra la la" -- @billy
Jordin Sparks: Wants to Make the Jen/Brangelina Triangle a Rectangle
"Ahhhhh! I just found my autographed photo of Brad Pitt I got while on Idol. I'm dyinggggg. I had SUCH a huge crush on him. Hahaha :)" -- @therealjordin
Eliza Dushku: Dog Whisperer Approved
"http://twitpic.com/16uv0m - Kids on leashes. Thoughts?" -- @elizadushku
Thomas Lennon: Don't You Mean OK GOzilla! ?
"Oh no! Me and @alyankovic turned into godzilla monsters at the OK GO video party. http://twitpic.com/16vnok" -- @thomaslennon
Shaq: Who's His @SOVS?
"Thank u to all dat sent me birthday tweets, wit my old ass, I kno, thanks love you all especially @_-_-_-__-_" -- @the_real_shaq
Perez Hilton: What's Your Damage?
"Dinner with @DohertyShannen. Would it be uncooth if I started quoting Heathers?"
"Fuck me gently with a chainsaw!!!" -- @perezhilton
"Fuck me gently with a chainsaw!!!" -- @perezhilton
Shannen Doherty: The Queen of Mean Is Now on Twitter
"My first twitter...this is odd" -- @dohertyshannen
Friday, March 5, 2010
And the Tweet of the Week Goes to...
TONY HAWK!!!
"Kid at skatepark (amidst many autograph requests): "hey Tony Hawk, hey Tony Hawk, hey Tony Hawk... What time is it?"" -- @tonyhawk
Honorable Mentions:
Mindy Kaling - So much to be grateful for in the age of the internet...
Conan O'Brien - You're such an oxymoron
Ice-T - Coming to a vending machine near you
"Kid at skatepark (amidst many autograph requests): "hey Tony Hawk, hey Tony Hawk, hey Tony Hawk... What time is it?"" -- @tonyhawk
Honorable Mentions:
Mindy Kaling - So much to be grateful for in the age of the internet...
Conan O'Brien - You're such an oxymoron
Ice-T - Coming to a vending machine near you
Devo: Important Distinction
"Devo does not make dance music. We make music that makes many want to dance." -- @devo
Neil Diamond: Oldie But Goodie
"What do you call somebody else's cheese? Nacho cheese! Stand by Daryl B. Mortacome" -- @neildiamond
Pamela Anderson: She Can't Eat Just One
"I'm heading to sandwhich to film my favorite chips"crisps" commercial. Walkers crisps. Salt and vinegar my favorite. !" -- @pameladanderson
Lil Wayne: Trying to Lock Down Conjugal Visits
"They kant lok up my heart bekuz y'all already have it on lok. ......thank u." -- @liltunechi
Thursday, March 4, 2010
Tony Hawk: Why Don't You Make Yourself Useful?
"Kid at skatepark (amidst many autograph requests): "hey Tony Hawk, hey Tony Hawk, hey Tony Hawk... What time is it?"" -- @tonyhawk
Weird Al: Role "Model"
"Often in times of adversity, I ask myself: What would Fabio do?" -- @alyankovic
Justin Bieber: Let's All Agree to Not Make "Bieberblast" Happen, Okay?
"EVERYONE...need you to bieberblast NEVER LET YOU GO and BABY up the ITUNES TOP 10 chart!! thanks...lets go for #1 and #2!!" -- @justinbieber
Russell Simmons: Circle, Circle, Dot, Dot, Now You've Got the Cooties Shot
"For one fully entrenched in Ahimsa no harm or violence can come to him. And he is known as "enlightened"" -- @unclerush
Tom Hanks: Do We Spy a Box of Chocolates?
"Colbert's snack array. Now those are snacks! http://twitpic.com/16mo9i Thanks, Steve. Hanx" -- @tomhanks
Elizabeth Banks: Doesn't Get Geriatric Humor
"Caught end of Wheel of Fortune. Vanna White telling the long version of a story about forgetting to brush her teeth. What is this show now?" -- @elizabethbanks
P Diddy: Was Possibly Having a Stroke During This Tweet
"Not impressed! Call me when your about to die and you don't stop! You keep going!Then ill be impressed! Talkin to myself! Fyi! 6-22-10! GO!" -- @iamdiddy
Thomas Lennon: The Male Camel Toe
"I thought leggings were in? Feels like everbody's staring at my nuts in these." -- @thomamslennon
Courtney Love: Has Moved on to Publicly Loving / Hating Billy Corgan
"i mean @lilyroseallen( yawn & yep her pr is better than mine if mine wants to keep her job want to see change) and @Billy are 2x BITTER!"
"and so now @Billy has hiw little la"friends" who tell him 24/7 hes a genius icon, noone tells me that, the pals were peeps he had grudges on"
"HUGE "ifyou talk to so and os your dead to me"type grudgs for years i dont know how @Billy is even healthy he has so much hatred inside"
"@Billy you are a genius really . i was so imoressed with greendays Doug Goodman the first dude in the biz who likes you,u gotta be niceman"
"@Billy i vALue you even when your badmouthing everyone that i love and wierdly fascinated by my daughter, i see who you are stobeing nasty"
"@Billy you wouldnt listen to @NeilStrauss you gravitate towards getting your diapers changed. dude some HUMILTY and GRATITUDE would be good"
"@Billy well ater all weve been thru im not going to take some du jour snarko comments in stone and care about them do what you need to do"
"@Billy i love you! greatful im excited for you but then i know you love me .yr cpas lied, shouldve loaned me that 100k nov 05 bad move." -- @courtneyloveuk
"and so now @Billy has hiw little la"friends" who tell him 24/7 hes a genius icon, noone tells me that, the pals were peeps he had grudges on"
"HUGE "ifyou talk to so and os your dead to me"type grudgs for years i dont know how @Billy is even healthy he has so much hatred inside"
"@Billy you are a genius really . i was so imoressed with greendays Doug Goodman the first dude in the biz who likes you,u gotta be niceman"
"@Billy i vALue you even when your badmouthing everyone that i love and wierdly fascinated by my daughter, i see who you are stobeing nasty"
"@Billy you wouldnt listen to @NeilStrauss you gravitate towards getting your diapers changed. dude some HUMILTY and GRATITUDE would be good"
"@Billy well ater all weve been thru im not going to take some du jour snarko comments in stone and care about them do what you need to do"
"@Billy i love you! greatful im excited for you but then i know you love me .yr cpas lied, shouldve loaned me that 100k nov 05 bad move." -- @courtneyloveuk
Jon Gosselin: Breaks His Twitter Silence
"Congratulations to Kate for joining the new season of DWTS. I am thrilled for her. She has my support and vote."
"Here is to 2010 for new beginnings and leaving the past mistakes in 2009." -- @jongosselin1
"Here is to 2010 for new beginnings and leaving the past mistakes in 2009." -- @jongosselin1
Lily Allen vs. Courtney Love: Round 254
"dont want to drag this thing out but, for the record i thought @courtneyloveuk was attacking me, hence my response."
"in retrospect, having read her twitter updates and found them quite hard to decipher, i think she is in trouble and in need of help....." -- @lilyroseallen
"in retrospect, having read her twitter updates and found them quite hard to decipher, i think she is in trouble and in need of help....." -- @lilyroseallen
Kelly Bensimon: Challenge Accepted
Thanks to all the nymag.com commenters. Your attention helps to facilitate new opportunties for me. Keep it up. Love to hate me, I dare you. --@kikillet
Stephen Colbert: Next Step, York Peppermint Patty Addiction
stared into my freezer for an hour this morning. I miss the olympics. --@StephenAtHome
Diablo Cody : Come Fly With Me
http://www.twitpic.com/16li85 Before safety regulations. I love that she also seems to be trying to yank off her friend's lap bar.
--@diablocody
Cesar Millan: Suspicious Use of Quotes
If you fulfill the "animal" and "dog" first, you can avoid problem behaviors related to breed. --@cesarmillan
Josh Groban: It's a Mad, Mad, Mad World Wide Web
"Ok chatroulette....amid a choppy sea of genitalia and loneliness, I will surf you to experiment this wacky societal dartboard. "
"I've met some college kids from UConn, 3 crotches, what I'm pretty sure was a dead body, and a drawing of a bunny. FASCINATING!!!!!!" -- @joshgroban
"I've met some college kids from UConn, 3 crotches, what I'm pretty sure was a dead body, and a drawing of a bunny. FASCINATING!!!!!!" -- @joshgroban
Jessica Simpson: Checks Her Impulses
"http://twitpic.com/16hkyg - Cleaning out my closets...20 boxes of NO's so far. Really? I bought this? My lord!! Hahaha" -- @jessicasimpson
Katy Perry: Easy Targets
"Is it wrong that I stick my tongue out at little kids when no one's watching." -- @katyperry
Roger Ebert: Just Telling Obama He's #1...
"McCain keeps his campaign promise of reaching across the aisle, starting with an upraised finger." -- @ebertchicago
Mike Tyson: Why Are Americans in So Much Debt Again?
"should i buy a lambo or pay my taxes?????" -- @_miketyson_
Dita Von Teese: Color Her Bad
"My italian interpreter is rocking aqua eyeshadow and coral lips and I'm loving it." -- @ditavonteese
Kelly Osbourne: Braving Dental Hygiene
"I could not sleep last night because I am going to the dentist today. The dentist is my biggest fear but im 25 and never had a filling!" -- @misskellyo
Yoko Ono: Next Week on 'Trading Spaces'...
"Imagine empty space. Imagine an empty room. Imagine all objects disappeared and erased from the room" -- @yokoono
Cindy Crawford: Once a President, Always a President
"BTW-4 all the people that gave me sh*t 4 saying President Clinton-I wasn't sure what the protocol was. I don't think it's ex--maybe Former??" -- @cindycrawford
Aubery O'Day: Bring Back Sweatpants
"DAYUM, there were some fierce camel toes at the gym today!" -- @aubreyoday
Conan O'Brien: Don't Use Leno as a Reference...
"This morning I applied for a job at Home Depot, but they couldn’t find an apron big enough to fit over my head. Tomorrow: Staples." -- @conanobrien
Ice T: Drink Him Up
"http://twitpic.com/16kuio - Daily Pic: I guess this is the right way to do it.. Good for those that can't read. #FLTG" -- @finallevel
Lisa Rinna: Not If You Eat Them With a Breakfast Burrito
"Is 630am too early for Nachos?" -- @lisarinna
Jordan Knight: Bouncin' Turkeys
No lie....a turkey just flew by and bounced off my windsheild...it's ok but how crazy!!!!--@jordanknight
Omar Epps: Self Gardening Tips
The seeds of self contain millions of flowers, it's on you to grow & blossom into your full potential... --@omarepps
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
Jordin Sparks: Penitentiary Pal
"I received an inmate fan mail letter today. That doesn't happen everyday. He was very nice. :)" -- @therealjordin
Sarah Silverman: No Home Don't Mean No Style
"Spotted a homeless man w/ a coat around his shoulders & full-on James Brown hair. He's the hardest working man in no-business." -- @sarahksilverman
Jewel: This Doesn't Look Like It Will End Well
"http://twitpic.com/16fest - a fellow Alaskan trained a pet moose to pull lumber- 'Get R Done' Alaskan style!" -- @jeweljk
Hoda: Eyeliner Emergency
"ughhhh--lost my makeup bag. hate that. must be in a nyc taxi somewhere..... ugh" -- @hodakotb
Ellen Degeneres: Oh Yes It's Ladies' Night!
"Tonight is Ladies Night at Idol. I think that means I get in free!" -- @theellenshow
John Mayer: Weekend at Nikki's?
"Let me just say out loud what everyone is thinking: was that really Nikki Sixx on the 1986 Theatre of Pain tour or an imposter?" -- @johncmayer
Courtney Love: Rock Star and Mathlete
"so how is it my fault if im really good at math i always scored really high on those dumbv IQ testsi play chess really well i see the forest" -- @courtneyloveuk
Aubrey O'Day: Having a Religious Flu Today?
"Just because God blesses you, doesn't mean there isn't another sneeze coming." -- @aubreyoday
Aisha Tyler: Not to Mention the Costumes
"If only the Olympics had been as emotional and fraught with international intrigue as RuPaul's Drag Race. I am... http://bit.ly/a5l6of" -- @aishatyler
William Shatner: Knows He's Old
#youknowyoureoldwhen You're reminded of a show you did, but don’t remember being in it. Or the network. Or that was even on. My best, Bill --@WilliamShatner
Howie Mandel: Needs a Telephone Booth Dressing Room
"I want to wear a cape today but when I put a jacket over it it makes me look as if I have a hunch back" -- @howiemandel
John Cusak: You Are Not the Boss of Him
"i tweet watever i feel like...that's all folks!" -- @shockozulu
Conan O'Brien: With a Little Help from His Friends
http://twitpic.com/1695g1 - This is how many people it took to write today's tweet: "Jumbo" shrimp? WTF!!
--@conanobrien
Lindsay Lohan: Why Does the Faux Version of Her Weigh 14 Pounds?
"http://twitpic.com/169pl5 - aim for the FAUX version of ME ages ago~i can loan you the dress witchGOATgurl!!!!!!!! @mdmolinari agrees* ha!" -- @lindsaylohan
Josh Groban: Back to Your Normal Programming
"Wellll Leno is back behind the desk and Seaworld has just reopened...minor glitch in The Matrix, folks. Can I offer you a free happy meal?" -- @joshgroban
Neil Patrick Harris: "Pull a Kanye" So Needs to Make It Into the Dictionary
"I will not be performing a duet with Martin Short to open the Oscars. Misinformation, I'm afraid. Should I maybe pull a Kanye, mid-show?" -- @actuallynph
Ryan Seacrest: Don't Most "Real Americans" Watch Idol and Leno on TV?
"In the audience tonight at idol? @sarahpalinusa and her kids...she came over after taping Leno. You wont see her on camera but she was there" -- @ryanseacrest
Roger Ebert: Don't Mess With Ebert
"Let Texas go ahead and secede. Easier for everyone." -- @ebertchicago
Sherri Shepherd: That's Not Model Behavior
"Okay really Naomi? You gotta stop w/thinking you have the right to hit people. A temper unchecked is gonna get you in a world of trouble" -- @sherrieshepherd
Mindy Kaling: When Life Gives You Lemons...
"whenever I get upset I think how lucky I am that there's no footage of me trying to hoist myself out of a swimming pool as a little kid" -- @mindykaling
Julie Bentz: Tolerant to House Guests
"babysitting Otis the goldendoodle for the next 5 days.last time he puked,peed on my wall and wiped his butt on my pillow-& I still love him!" -- @juliebentz
Michael Ian Black: Just Dial Reno 911
"In Reno, which is the city for people Las Vegas rejected for being too desperate and sad." -- @michaelianblack
Kim Kardashian: Knows Some Party Animals
"http://twitpic.com/16ccnz - Rocky partied too hard at @Reggie_Bush 's bday party!" -- @kimkardashian
Lady Gaga: It's Refreshing When a Celeb Doesn't Complain About Being Rich and Famous
"Its so silly,I do these interviews, + they say Gaga "arent u sick of the life," I think to myself, if they only knew how much I love my fans" -- @ladygaga
Isaiah Mustafa: What's That Smell? The "I'm on a Horse" Guy Is on Twitter
"This Old Spice commercial is hysterical and I love the actor! He’ll be on the show next week. Check him out: http://su.pr/5C6uxE" -- @theellenshow
"Will someone please give that Old Spice "I'm on a horse!" guy his own TV show? Dude is brilliant." -- @rainnwilson
"@rainnwilson Such wisdom in those words. Thanks man!" -- @isaiahmustafa
If you're not familiar, watch, then follow him on Twitter!
"Will someone please give that Old Spice "I'm on a horse!" guy his own TV show? Dude is brilliant." -- @rainnwilson
"@rainnwilson Such wisdom in those words. Thanks man!" -- @isaiahmustafa
If you're not familiar, watch, then follow him on Twitter!
Andy Roddick: Loves the Yellow Pages
"saw movie "cop out" last night.. i thought it was pretty funny, but then again tracy morgan could read the phone book and i would laugh..." -- @andyroddick
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
Bow Wow: Night at the Department Store
"Man me and @antthaladiesman lost in jc penny. Cant find our way out the department store. Entrances all look da same. Gnr" -- @bowwow
Margaret Cho: Cheating Is Gross
"Stepping up my cooking this year. Slightly only. No salt so I'm stealing the salt I use in my humidifier." -- @margaretcho
Kelly Osbourne: Just in Time for Easter
"i just dyed my hair lavender again and i loooooove it!" -- @misskellyo
Candace Cameron: Stands By Her Man
"Glen Beck??? Love him- RT @TameraMowryTwo: Fox News... seriously some of ur anchors buuug! That Megan Kelly and Glen Beck to name a few..." -- @candacecbure
Pamela Anderson: Puts the Fox in Fox Trot
"I'm feel so lucky to be doing Dancing with the Stars. It's going to be a lot of hard work, but I'm excited to learn and work really hard." -- @pameladanderson
Jewel: Keeps Her Snaggle Sparkling
"Headed 2 get my teeth cleaned-they may b crooked, but the r sperkeling white! Haha" -- @jeweljk
Adrianne Curry: God Is the Devil in Disguise?
"I KNOW if there is a god he is a man, what woman would bestow periods upon her fellow female? Heels, corsets&periods are the fault of men" -- @adriannecurry
Ricky Martin: Please Keep Your Day Job, Whatever It Is
"#joke- What goes ha, ha, ha, plop?"
"Somene who laughs so hard they poo their pants. LOL" -- @ricky_martin
"Somene who laughs so hard they poo their pants. LOL" -- @ricky_martin
John Cusak: Pay Attention Before Seeking Brownie Points, Please
"in the biggest tax cut for wealthy in history of country -- orrin hatch is a liar and he knows it."
"RT honeylover2 @shockozulu Hello. And thanks for the great washington post link. Outspoken and handsome. Love it!"
"the washington post peice by orrin hatch is horeshit bald face lieing.." -- @shockozulu
"RT honeylover2 @shockozulu Hello. And thanks for the great washington post link. Outspoken and handsome. Love it!"
"the washington post peice by orrin hatch is horeshit bald face lieing.." -- @shockozulu
Meghan McCain: Just Needs to Shine
somewhere btwn my internet going out, a leak & mold in my closet and my book almost being due, I need glitter & wine tonight & more glitter. --@McCainnBlogette
Solange Knowles: That Mag's So White, She Gotta Wear Shades
"Just realizing ive never seen a black girl on the COVER of @NylonMag and its one of my fave mag's EVER! Can we fix that please?" -- @solangeknowles
J Woww: First Impressions of Her Fellow Cast Members?
U ever meet someone and go "WTF r they on?"... Lol --@JENNIWOWW
Kirstie Alley: Hide-and-Go-Eat
they are yelling at me to film..it's much easier to hide out in your trailor than in your kitchen....need a trailor kitchen next season..lol --@KirstieAlley
Monday, March 1, 2010
Joan Rivers: Tells It Like It Is
"Finding it sad and difficult to write an obituary for a friend who died over the weekend. Is it wrong to say he loved black men and pizza?" -- @joan_rivers
Rainn Wilson: Recycle Your Grillz
"i'm a HUGE fan of Canadian hard-core/gansta rap. 'Da Mounteez' have an awesome song called "N---, Don't Litta!" that's really hard hitting." -- @rainnwilson
John Mayer and Ke$ha: A Twitter Romance
"Dear Ke$ha, you have won me over with your tricks and charms and I must tell you I really like your song." -- @johncmayer
"@johncmayer dear john mayerrr. Don't be a little b*tch wit ur chit chat. Jus $how me whur ur dick's at. x" -- @keshasuxx
"@johncmayer dear john mayerrr. Don't be a little b*tch wit ur chit chat. Jus $how me whur ur dick's at. x" -- @keshasuxx
Jenny McCarthy: Her Job Is Gratifying
"I don't like black toilets. I can't see my work." -- @jennyfrommtv
Amanda Bynes: Doesn't Get Goth
"i like wearing light pink or peach lipstick/gloss. why do sum girls wear black/dark purple lipstick? in a movie i would but in real life? no" -- @amandabynes
Andrew WK: Prepares a Delightful Breakfast Medley
"I'm now preparing a bowl of Cheerio, Honey Nut Cheerio, Grape Nut, peanut, & raisin! With vitamin D whole milks!" -- @andrewwk
Star Jones: Stupid Is as Stupid Does
"I tell you...YOUTH FADES...but DUMB is FOREVER. Let people think you're stupid...don't open your mouth and confirm their suspicions." -- @starjonesesq
Meghan McCain: Home Sweet Shoe Rack
"sometimes I feel like my apartment is just the place where my shoes live and when I come home they're like "hey bitch, we've been fabulous"" -- @mccainblogette
Yoko Ono: Willy Wonka Has a Room Like That
"The room without gravity is the room you take your heavy heart into. See what happens to you." -- @yokoono
John Stamos: Doesn't Want to Taste Rubber
"I'M NOT DOING DANCING WITH THE STARS/ flattered to be asked (i guess)i'm not a dancer- i'd put my foot in my mouth faster than john mayer" -- @johnstamos
Talib Kweli: Maybe It's Autotune That Brings Out the Devil
"Someone I was following just tweeted "yo guru I don't care if u in a coma, wassup w that autotune shit u did?" Unfollowed so fast"
"Twitter can bring out the devil in some people wow" -- @realtalibkweli
"Twitter can bring out the devil in some people wow" -- @realtalibkweli
Martina McBride: You Do Now
"There is a dog in my backyard. We don't have a dog." -- @martinamcbride
Lily Allen: The Picture That Started a Thousand Tweets From Courtney Love
"http://twitpic.com/1620en -" -- @lilyroseallen
Courtney Love: Calls Lily Allen a Feral Dog, Among Other Things
"oh @lilyroseallen tweeted that pic? thats just baby brat nonsense we are NOT having a" FUED" WOULDNT DEIGN TO post a pic of her thighs."
"@lilyroseallen but im not the one on gak every night dear, you are, and im not the one who uses the word "relevant" to reassure meselfALWAYS"
"@lilyroseallen your really a brat, is there anyone who you havent started a meaningless strop with? the night you did all the blow on earth"
"@lilyroseallen the night you home invaded me did all the blow ive ever seen in my home wouldnt leave and blamed ME for yr shit show?thighs?"
"But then again i dont pick fights with insanely deluded irrevelant friendless unatractive children who noone i know even close to likes."
"& i was over it and then she twitpicced a lovely unflattering picture of me whose got the most? we could go on all night, shes jealous endof"
"like a feral woofy dog whose not gettiong enough attention hissing as me and the boys walked by, i know we beat fucking ass at nme so suckit"
"if @lilyroseallen had a lock on chanel couture ill eat my miumiu my prada and my cavalli i just got in sample size. theres no way, inhelll"
"owrds of the Vogue editrix had dinner with " that girl is just a fat leedle english brat wiz a rich mommy tomorrow voila!gone" its tomorrow"
"@lilyroseallen but im not the one on gak every night dear, you are, and im not the one who uses the word "relevant" to reassure meselfALWAYS"
"@lilyroseallen your really a brat, is there anyone who you havent started a meaningless strop with? the night you did all the blow on earth"
"@lilyroseallen the night you home invaded me did all the blow ive ever seen in my home wouldnt leave and blamed ME for yr shit show?thighs?"
"But then again i dont pick fights with insanely deluded irrevelant friendless unatractive children who noone i know even close to likes."
"& i was over it and then she twitpicced a lovely unflattering picture of me whose got the most? we could go on all night, shes jealous endof"
"like a feral woofy dog whose not gettiong enough attention hissing as me and the boys walked by, i know we beat fucking ass at nme so suckit"
"if @lilyroseallen had a lock on chanel couture ill eat my miumiu my prada and my cavalli i just got in sample size. theres no way, inhelll"
"owrds of the Vogue editrix had dinner with " that girl is just a fat leedle english brat wiz a rich mommy tomorrow voila!gone" its tomorrow"
Rose McGowan: Wizard Studies
"Woke up and decided I need to re-read the Harry Potter books. Just thought I'd say that on a group level." -- @rosemcgowan
Kerri Kenney: Ah!! Word of the Day
I'm trying to beef up my vocabulary a bit. Today I'm going to use the word "humdinger" every chance I get. --@kerrikenney
Al Roker: Food First, Photos Later
Lugging six bags of groceries outta Whole Foods and a woman asks to take a pic. I say "Lemme get these in a cab". Gets upset & leaves. Weird --@alroker
Courtney Love: With Britney's Ex?
SamLutfi he thought it was last bight hes not a slippy kisser he just is a kisser im not used to it plus he actually gets and likes me,wierd --@CourtneyLoveUK
Patti Stanger: Dating Directions, or Directions to Carnegie Hall?
Get out there & keep trying. If your date has no potential whatsoever, you’re still getting dating practice in & everyone needs practice... --@pattistanger
Spencer Pratt: I'm Sorry I Was Too Busy Vomiting in My Mouth to 'Feel You'
I go to bed extra early now so that I can be awake by 3am to start my calm time. For me this early is the only time I can be gentle. Feel me --@SpencerPratt
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